Rest & resistance

When it comes to resting, have you ever had the thought, “I haven’t finished all my work, so I can’t rest!” or “I don’t deserve to rest because I haven’t accomplished XYZ today”?

This is something I experienced often in my previous career as an account manager at a software sales startup. The culture very much celebrated working when you're not at work, and always being available for client needs. While there are merits to working hard, OVER-working yourself will inevitably lead to burnout. I experience burnout when my mind tells me to keep working, keep pushing, until my body says, nope! However, we live in a society that often values urgency and perfectionism, so it can be extremely difficult to step back.

The thing is, we don’t need to earn rest; we require rest.

Identify your green, orange, and red flags.

Green flags are indications that we’re well rested and charged-up. For instance, having extra energy to take a long walk at the end of your day, or waking up early with ease so you can enjoy your morning. We love these flags. No edits.

Orange flags are warning signs that you might be approaching burnout (think: the signs that it's coming, before it's too late to make changes). Sometimes, people with executive function struggles miss their orange flags altogether, so it can be helpful to first figure out what they even are. An example of an orange flag might be yelling profanities (in the safe container of your car) at the person driving below the speed limit in front of you. Was it annoying? Absolutely. Was the reaction bigger than it needed to be? Perhaps. Not that I’m speaking from personal experience…

Another common orange flag is a decreased interest in doing the things that you love. While the interest is lower, you might still have the energy to do the things. It may be more red flag territory if you feel unable to partake in things you usually love…

Red flags for burnout might look like a desire to do/accomplish/go, but a physical inability to motivate yourself. Symptoms like exhaustion, withdrawal from things you typically enjoy, and increased coping skills that don’t serve you (like alcohol use, doom scrolling, etc.). If you notice your red flags, you’re burnt out. Despite the resistance you might have, you’ll need to rest to come out of this.

I’ll leave you with a reframe for my burnt out friends:

Instead of asking yourself, "Have I worked hard enough to deserve rest?"

Try "Have I rested well enough to do my BEST work?"